Don't Judge Friday: Dignity is overated.

Remember that scene in the Mighty Ducks when the kids suddenly come together and learn the meaning of team work? My kids have suddenly developed a cohesiveness, their own version of the V formation...

Are you raising a wimpy kid, and need to toughen them up? How about one that is a little full of themselves and thinks they are a bully? Lets say you run into me and my marshmallows at the park. Then say your kid wants to go down a slide and yells at the kids already there to get out of his way. And my three preschoolers decide to tag team your kid, one pushing him down the slide, one sliding after him and nailing him in the back, while the other one commandos down the twin slide and clocks your kid in the stomach with an elbow jab. Uh, huh. My kids really did this. Even better...I'm standing next to this kids mom doing my "of course you can homeschool your child, don't worry about them being socialized," monologue. As I am looking on, horrified his mother goes. "Oh thank goodness, he's needed to be brought down to size for years now, he is such a little bully." Well then. Glad I could help. Maybe I should lease them out?



Dear Fraternal Order of the Police,

I know what your thinking, you should have never have called though near nap time. Please let me explain so that what you heard is not taken out of context. Remember as you started asking for money-and my 3 year old interrupted and asked who was on the phone? I know that her screaming "It's the poe poe, It's the poe poe! And then you heard the sound of crying, and whimpering right? Can you please give me the benefit of the doubt that when I threw the phone down, and you heard me yelling "Oh my God, I swear the cops are not coming to get mommy Lilly." and "Stop holding your breath!" There is another explanation besides us being a criminal sect who has scarred their children. Why did you hang up? I would have told you that last week I woke up to a blaring television, Lilly on the couch with her feet up, chugging back one of my Coke Zero's watching what else? Yes, cops. I blame the helpful guy in the video for saying "poe poe," over and over again along with a mom crackhead being drug away while her children are screaming. I just wanted to explain a little. Money is on the way, as I secretly believe that sticker might just get me out of tickets.

Thank you,

Mom who is not a criminal, I just have unsupervised night owls that like watching violent television. (cause this sounds better to me. :)